Thursday, June 9, 2011

Fixing My Eyes...

I am taken over.
After 43 years of walking the planet:
...of simply existing....
breathing, eating, sleeping...running, walking, playing...learning...working...
I can say....I fall asleep and He is last thought.
I wake up surrounded by His presence...a new day because He wills.
This is not a feeling.
Is is a knowing.
What amazes me is the awareness that : There is NOTHING else.
Everything I gaze upon is defined by Him.
By Him.

"Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever."
~~Psalm 73:25-26~~

This life is His pen to paper.
His brush to canvas.
His chisel to stone.
Like the words of the song: This is the air I breathe...your very word: spoken to me.
"The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it,
the world, and all who live in it;
for he founded it upon the seas
and established it upon the waters."
~~Psalm 24:1-2 ~~
I stumbled across a blog written by a Father Stephen and found this quote:

I think evil is always small, and that good is infinite. Evil closes itself to God and thus becomes even smaller; Good opens itself to God and thus becomes infinite. Evil cannot become so large as to fill even the universe. God became so small that He could fill Hell and then burst it asunder because it could not contain Him. Every good deed will have eternal remembrance, but even the largest deeds of the evil will be forgotten.

He fills all.
Truth fills all.
Love fills all.
Nothing else remains.
Nothing else is really real.
He is the story.
Good swallows evil.
Life conquers death.

Lately I have felt like a tuning fork..vibrating...resonating...
I fell on the Rock...Christ Jesus...and have been broken wide open...
But the music...the sound ..the beauty of His character..His nature...His ever-present-ness..
Has rocked my world.
It is like the word is ALIVE to me...every word filled with portentous weight.
I have been awakened....when I didn't even know I was asleep.
I am beginning to see what David meant when he penned Psalm 119
Distilled down: He loved God's word/his laws/his commands: more than life itself.
It is like he knew: there is NO life without God's word.
He was fixated.Obsessed.Consumed.
His bones groaned with the knowledge.
The truth: God's words are LIFE.
What God has to say on a minute by minute basis: matters !
He is the living word.

 So when I fix my eye on Jesus....
When I allow the Holy Spirit to dominate the landscape of my mind, my thoughts, my beliefs and then my actions.... I walk in truth.
All else is a lie.
There is NOTHING...beside Him.
As I am waking up to this truth..It is like I have become a living flame:
This is my reason for being: To know him
This knowing is such a gift...a working of His Holy Spirit.
This knowledge changes my living.
It changes everything.
The story....
I am NOT the main character....HE IS.

"So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, 
but on what is unseen.
For what is seen is temporary, 
but what is unseen is eternal."
~~ 2 Corinthians 4:18 ~~

This FIXING of my eyes...has become such an integral truth in my life.
What does it mean can I does this change my days?
 My heart pounds as I write this...I know the truth of this..I have experienced this first hand...
..but I am so humbly aware that it is NOT my doing... it is the work of the Spirit ..
He reveals Jesus...He explains the mystery...HE draws us forth into the light..
But oh... the wonder...the transcendence... of surrender.
I want Him.
All Consuming Desire.
I know it...every cell of my body knows it.
This broken body. This feeble mind. This breathing dust bag.
Knows it's maker for what He is: EVERYTHING.
He has FIXED my I can FIX my EYES....

And so today I say with Paul:

"I pray also that the eyes of your heart 
may be enlightened 
in order that you may know the hope 
to which he has called you, 
the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints."
~~ Ephesians 1:18 ~~, finisher...of my faith...
He is my inheritance...
He is everything.
All I see.

No comments:

Post a Comment