Sunday, February 22, 2009

Crutches...Hamlet and Life as I Like It...

This has been quite the week.
I fought and defeated a nasty cold...endured and overcame the stomach flu..and am healing from a nasty sprained ankle, wrenched knee and bruised hip.

Just before all that transpired in my life...
...my mother's house was hit by an oil-tanker and rocked on it's foundations.
It has been decided by structural engineers that the house should be torn down and rebuilt.

My Uncle Eric survived another bout with his heart.

I have family who have been living and working in Israel during the latest crisis.

Someone my sister knows lost her husband in a freak snowmobile accident on the night of Valentine's Day.

One of my brother-in-laws has been diagnosed with Huntington's Disease.

My eldest is coming home from Kelowna tomorrow.
He needs a job.

My youngest is thirteen and made me win the game of Aggravation last night...just because he hates to see me lose.

My friend is in her last month of pregnancy and is moving this week.

My bills are paid..my bank account is empty.

Someone on freecycle has a pair of crutches for me.

I hate being laid up.

To be or not to be.

To live...or die...

I woke up today...

Other people didn't.

Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.

What is this thing called life?

My son Jeremy asked me the other day..
"Mom..how do we know that this is all real?"

I told him:

"What you can't see is more real than this."

Laugh.
Cry.

Louder.

I can feel it shimmering in my bones.

Purpose.

The limits frustrate me.
My limits.

Deep inside where it really matters...
Where I am...simply who I am...
Defined and held...
Understood and known...
Loved...
Purposed...

I realize...

He is that for all of us.
Even when we don't realize.
Our knowledge...limited..
Our understanding..
Obscured...

Does. Not. Limit. Him.

Life is not breathing.
Heart pumping.
Synapses firing.
Self knowing.

Can you hear the rocks and trees screaming?

He is bigger.
In him it is all fitly held together.

Today I am sure the sunrise is full of music.
The wind is drifting melodies..roaring symphonies...
The ocean...thunderous rhythm...

And you and I...
We were made to believe...
Woven...in the depths..
Crafted...

How can we not love?
It is why we are.


Today I surrender...to the wonder of being fully known...
Of knowing then...that all is in his care...

He is perfect... the center of all things..
The origin...
The reason...

Incomprehensible.

And yet...

Can you see it...
Sometime I see the truth of it hovering just out of my peripheral vision...
If I could turn my head slightly..I would see...

Today I don't have to see to know..
I guess that is faith then.

I trust.

Simply.

What relief.

The wonder of that strikes my heart and I can barely see the keyboard to write.

What is this thing called love?

It is what gives meaning to it all.
No matter what it all looks like.

It's a new day....

This is Life...

As I like it!

2 comments:

  1. You were up at 6:30 AM blogging?!!!!!
    lol
    Again, you speak to my heart. And I'm such a grump today! I need to read your words as more often than not they echo my own thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Wow.. just wow. That is one heck of a week.

    ReplyDelete