With Gratitude I Remember

Gang-Gang's Farm: Lochaber, N.S ~ photo credit Tracy Auton Stuit

He is a wise man who does not grieve 

for the things which he has not, 

but rejoices for those which he has. 

~Epictetus

Some of my happiest moments were spent in that house and playing in the surrounding acres of fields and forest. 
Jumping from the rafters of the barn into the sweet smelling hay. 
Carrying buckets of water from the spring at the bottom of the hill, there was no running water. 

I remember candlewick quilts, chamberpots and the outhouse. 
Cousins, aunts and uncles.
Deer under the apple tree, roses on the wall paper, carrying wood from the wood-house.
The wood stove, ice on the windows and the tree house.


This is where my memories begin: at Gang-Gang's.

I remember her strong gnarly hands grasping mine as she taught me how to knead biscuit dough in the old pantry.
Day dresses and thick nylons were her regular attire. 
A glorious crown of white hair framed a wrinkled face. 
She always seemed old to me
Her skin resembled parchment paper except soft: it was her "raincoat" as we kids called it. 
Bernice Malloy was her name. Mother to my maternal grandfather Alexander.


These people are my heritage. Their fingerprints are indelibly imprinted upon my soul.
Gratitude  wells up within my heart as I whisper thanks for those who loved and nurtured me as a child.


For this I am grateful :
I have been loved.
I am loved.
I love.


I rejoice.

What are you grateful for today?

All is Grace

" What in all this world is grace?

I can say it certain now: All is grace.

I see through the woods of the world:

God is always good and I am always loved.

God is always good and I am always loved.

~~ 1000 Gifts, Ann Voskamp ~~

This week has been a week of announcements and notices.
One friend pregnant: eight years between first and second born
One family member pregnant with #7.
One about to give birth to #6.
Another friend approaches her due date...a first born, a  daughter eagerly anticipated.

This week I received notification of the death of a friend.
The terminal illness of the mother of another friend.
A premature precious baby Sarah struggles to fight another infection in the neonatal ICU.

This week I struggled with chronic pain, sinus and cough and fever.
I have wrestled with insomnia...
It seems as if all my shortcomings and weaknesses have battered me all week....
Blessed or cursed?

My car needs a new...ummm ..everything...from a windshield wiper motor to new gear box and a belt is squealing somewhere...loudly and painfully.
 Gas prices soared.
Grocery prices have increased substantially.
A lady I never met..but who was cared for by my mother died at 85 years of age this week after a long drawn out battle with cancer.
Japan was hit by another quake.
Bow Island, Alberta is flooding.

"...give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

1 Thessalonians 5:18 NIV

Really?
Can I take the pain...the sorrow..the bewilderment... give thanks for it...and find it transformed?
Into Joy?
Is there a peace to be found in the midst of the horror, the struggle...the loss, the failure?
Peace that surpasses understanding ?
Cause I really don't understand.

Can I give thanks at all times..in all things: because HE is ALWAYS good?

Gratitude.Today. Now.

He makes all things new.
HE MAKES ALL THINGS NEW.
ALL.THINGS.NEW.

Yes!

Grief is always transformed.
Suffering transmuted.
The ugly transfigured.


The Word of God..which sustains.. which holds all things together..is sharp...like the surgeons knife..
Dividing...
d i v i d i n g
between flesh and spirit.
joints and marrow.

God speaks.
It is as he says.
It is written...

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect

in weakness."

2 Cor 12:9

Sufficient. Grace.

Enough.
For everything...
Every.Thing.

Eyes washed.
Sight to the blind.
To me.
I must see.
He is in ALL.
He is ALL good.

Yesterday, today and forever...amen and amen.

In Everything....

I sat on the couch yesterday morning, half reclining with an ice pack on my shoulder and a hot coffee in hand...watching the snow swirl down on cold arctic air... on this, the second day of Spring. Weariness assailed me, built up from weeks of chronic pain and compounded by a sleepless night. My sons gathered round, anticipating our devotional time... I stare into their faces, memorizing, appreciating...thankful.
I lay aside our regular devotions and pick up 1000 Gifts by Ann Voskamp.
This book has become a companion these last weeks. a friend that whispers, provokes, cajoles, encourages and shatters.....
God is who he says!
I dare to read aloud to young minds, immature ...developing...my sons...
I am gripped with urgency:
In this world you will have trouble:it is everywhere..inescapable...here in front of you: in my very body: trouble with a capital T. ...
But... HE has overcome the world.
Do you wonder ..I ask..gazing deep into soul depths yet unexplored... inexperienced.... still unknown by their possessors...what is the will of God?

Can you know ???

Infants...still...embryonic faith...still linked to mother's resources....trusting her life source....tied...anchored

"In everything give thanks," ... I whisper into the day...into their fertile hearts....
" For this IS the will of God..in Christ Jesus concerning you!"....
I proclaim the last with bold assurance...and fragile body quakes...
Why? How?
They question , bewildered...... as they watch me shift in pain and wince...stretch out legs shocked by nerves uncontrolled...pale faced and shadowed eyes...fierce fire blazing hot deep within leaps outward...heart caught by truth:

It is possible.
It is necessary.
It is essential.
There is no salvation without thanks.
No true freedom...without gratitude.

"It is possible to say yes..and live no. "
(Ann Voskamp)


I have in many ways...for years.

The yes way is narrow.
It is dangerous...unsafe...uncomfortable...pain-ful
It is a place of naked wanting. ..only God.
Knowing only him.
Whom have I but you?
Joy commeth.
It is here.
It is now.

I offer my sons, the deliberately woven in the depths...intended creations of a mighty God...
Those sons....
I offer them..their maker.
All in all.
Author.
Finisher.
Knower.
Designer.
Keeper.
Redeemer.

I pray that they will hold up their "not enough" ...thank Him...and  know that He is "more than enough".

That they will live and love and follow
That they will know the will of God....and give thanks...in everything.
In.
Every.
Thing.
Thank-you Father.....

Gratitude

"Gratitude is the single response most nourishing to health."

Dr.Paul Brand

 

 It is well with my soul.

More than well.

His Holy Presence..lives within me.

Surrounds me.

His word..spoken.

Keeps me.

Water to quench my thirst.

(humble thanks)

Daily Bread

Food to fill my belly.

(sincere appreciation)

Rest.

Warmth.

Shelter.

Breath.

Mercy.

Friendship.

Waves.

Wind.

Music.

Colour.

Compassion. 

Hope.

Purpose.

Generosity.

Community.

Forgiveness.

Faith.

Potential.

Sight.

Sound

Touch.

Beauty.

Aging.

Fragrance.

Family

Light

Sons

Husband.

Savior

Love. 

Sacrifice.

Life.

Shared.