It Is Possible... ( from the archives )

It is possible :

~ for a heart to be full of joy and sorrow at the same time.

It is possible :

~ for awareness to co-exist with ignorance.

It is possible to look into the face of a child and see innocence and guilt mirrored in their eyes.

It is possible :

~ to have hope intermingled with despair.

Peace at war with chaos.

Patience threatened with anger.

Kindness walking hand in hand with greed.

It is possible for coldness to penetrate warmth.

Light to pierce the dark.

Streams to flood the desert.

It is possible for strangers to be friends.

Friends to be strangers.

Family to be estranged.

It is possible for :

The unlimited to become limited.

The timeless to be constrained by time.

The invisible to become visible.

For the uncreated to become..kill-able.

It is possible for a person to gain the whole world and lose their soul.

It is possible to honor with words and not your heart.

It is possible :

~ to give your body to be burned
~ give all you have to the poor
~ understand all mysteries
~ have all knowledge

...and STILL not have Love...

It is NOT possible to love God and hate your brother.

I M P O S S I B L E

Love by its very definition must flow through.

Forgiveness must be received into and flow out of ones heart unhindered or it's not forgiveness.

Love and forgiveness cannot be stopped or stored up.

Grace and Mercy must flow freely.

It is possible.

With God.

All things are possible :

With

God.

Wounded Loving

Broken glass, tumbled in the surf at Glass Beach in Fort Bragg, California, photo by Jef Poskanzer

It has been a rough couple of weeks years.( the time is blurring )

Thankfulness rises accompanied by tears today.
It is a messy sort of gratitude grown from within the crucible of suffering, pain, frustration...exhaustion...

It is as my beautiful friend Shawntele put it: Joy in the Midst

~ I am grateful for the miracle of Love : whereby we hold our wounded selves against another wounded soul and trust that the Father is making something beautiful out of the mess.

~ I am so thankful for mercy and grace extended when fear dominates and clouds vision and reason.

~ My heart  is humbled by fractured hearts still reaching out, blossoming in the reality of our Heavenly Father's unlimited, matchless Grace and Love.

~ For breath and hope and the ability to let go and trust when everything that can be shaken...is.

~ For Life distilled into precious oil...that anoints and infuses the soul with a sense of eternity.

I am thankful for you....for all of you who read, who comment...who bless me with your lives...

We the broken, wounded lovers..are being made beautiful....just wait and see!

Love Actually

He reaches for her as a moan escapes from between her clenched teeth. A whisper penetrates the darkness:
"What do you need?"
Lost in agony she grasps his hand beneath the covers:
"I don't know yet", she replies, body frozen in pain, locked in position with tears creating salty paths from beneath closed lids to hairline: wetting her pillow.




He slides out of their warm bed and makes his way to the window, sliding it shut. Reaching up she locks her arms around his strong neck and he lifts her into a reclining position. Screams stay imprisoned behind locked lips.
One skirmish won on this dark Tuesday morning.

Pain rules the moment, but insidious tendrils of something else, something stronger than the agony, filter through the red hot haze.

Her face is buried in his neck as her feet shuffle with his in a stumbling dance to the washroom. Strong hands, tender hands cradle her as she, unable to carry her own weight: leans heavily on his arms.

Love weaves it's way through and wraps itself around her heart. tears of gratitude mingle with tears of pain.  "I have what I need", she whispers as he falls back asleep beside her, hand stretched out to maintain connection as he steals a few more minutes before beginning his day. 

She waits for the meds to kick in. As the minutes pass she recalls the day she said: "I do."
 Her eyes drift closed as she realizes: This day was encompassed in that moment, like a forest is encased in a single seed. The words of the song: 'What is this thing called Love...' drift through her mind...along with the answer to the question: This is that thing called Love...this is Love Actually!
And she smiles.....and the pain gives an inch.

Love Trumps

I slowly stretch as I awaken on this beautiful sunny simply gorgeous September morning. My bedroom door is shut, courtesy of my middle son who is busy down the hall in our den. He hears me stirring, knocks on my door and asks if there is anything he can get me.Before he heads down the stairs to get me a V8 with cracked pepper, he turns on my computer for me.

I lay in the stillness beside my husband of 22 years and tears leak from beneath my lids.
I breathe a prayer of thanksgiving and blessing.


My second born enters on the heels of his brother.
"Mom, we are out of coffee, I am heading out to get some and will get some milk too."


My heart skips a beat.


I lean over and grab my bible. 
I am behind in my reading...the week  went by so quickly and I battled...I fought..I raged...
I feared and I hid.


And God was with me.


As I write today I sip a steaming mug full of Three Sisters Coffee ( Kicking Horse) {My fav !!!}
It was delivered to my hands minutes ago by a son born almost 20 years ago. I recall this same son saying to me years ago, back when he still fit on my lap and snuggled under my arm:

" Mom, I am most myself 

when I am serving others."

There is no higher call. None.


My week was full.
Not of huge activity visible to the naked eye, but inside where no one can see : I fought.
I laid down at night, day after day and cried out.I closed my eyes, left with nothing but a bedrock trust.
My foundations held.
I ran  into the arms of the Only One who truly knows me. I was safe.


Needs pile up.
Confidence falters.
Desperation builds.
Questions batter.
Perceptions distort.

LOVE trumps all of it.


In the face of battles and wounds, lack and wanting...failure and fear...


My hands empty..
I throw it all down so I can grasp hold of God.
I know I am loved.
I know he is good.

Love remains...opinions, perceptions..they are dust in the wind.
My head bows, thankfulness arises...gratefulness builds again.


Sustained.
Beloved.
His.

Love is...

1. A husband carrying you to the bathroom  at 4am 

after you wake him screaming,

holding you in your most vulnerable state.

2. Sons who take over all the house hold chores without complaint.

3. Strong arms to lean on when navigating stairs.

4. Encouraging messages first thing in your inbox.

5. A mother who picks up the phone in the wee hours 

while I'm waiting for meds to kick in and listens to me cry.

6. Neighbors within hobbling distance with swings in shady places 

not afraid or embarrassed by the tears slipping down my cheeks.

7. Sisters far away holding tight. Praying hard.

8. Friends who share their burdens while shouldering yours.

9. Kisses...lots of kisses.

10.Telephone prayers.

...and a million other things tiny and big...

How blessed am I !

Love is what defines me.

I pray that you love lavishly today those who cross your path..or your mind...

...and I pray that you know you are loved in return.

Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good.
            His love endures forever.  

~~ Psalm 136: 1 ~~